Something that is so close to my heart is Pastors and their families. Having been a pastor's daughter and a pastor's wife.... I understand the inside world of the pressures that pastors face daily.
The elders who direct the affairs of the church well are worthy of double honor, especially those whose work is preaching and teaching. 1 Timothy 5:17
Some people ask the questions, "WHY should we honor our Pastors? We pay them to do their job... how are their needs or circumstances any different from mine?"
That may seem shocking to you - but in reality there are many people out there who really still do not understand the pressures that Pastors face. IT IS A JOB LIKE NO OTHER.
* Do you have any idea what it is like to have someone "mad" at you every other week because something at the church isn't how they like it?
* Do you have any idea what it is like to have people that you love warring against one another and you about how the music is "terrible" (every church seems to have this battle!)
* Do you carry the WEIGHT of counseling and praying with people you love whose lives are falling apart, marriages are disintegrating, are having to file bankruptcy, are battling addictions and the pull of falling away from God?
* Do you have to figure out how to make sure there is enough tithes and offering to pay the building payment, the utility bills, the salaries, to support missions, and all of the other MANY things the church does? Do you have the heaviness of knowing that if everyone would just do their part and tithe - that the church would be able to be all that God wants it to be in the community?
* Do you have any idea how PERSONAL the job of being a Pastor is? That every person who leaves the church or who doesn't like something can attack you PERSONALLY?
* Do you know what it is like to POUR yourself into people and them still walk away from church over the smallest things?
* Do you know what it is like to live in a fish bowl? Where everyone watches everything you do and feels they have the right to criticize you or have unrealistic expectations?
* Do you know what it is like to pour every drop of your life into a church - and when pastor appreciation rolls around you just get a few handshakes and pats on the back... and maybe a check from the church.... which is good and all - but it doesn't SPEAK and SHOUT Appreciation the way it could and should?
I could go on. But that should give you a taste. :)
October is Pastor Appreciation Month (aka Clergy Appreciation Month). I know that many churches have a plan to express their love to their pastors, but I also know that many churches "ASSUME" that their pastor "KNOWS that we love Him".... therefore we don't really need to do anything other than shake his hand, pat him on the back, and say "we appreciate you pastor."
I see it a little like the relationship in a marriage. Imagine that a husband marries his wife and tells her that day how much he loves her. However, over the next 10 years they just co-exist and and the husband does not continue to express his love to his wife in tangible ways. Will the wife really KNOW how much her husband loves her? Or will his ongoing and sometimes surprise and unexpected acts of love and service PROVE that that love is still alive and true?
Many of us have studied the book, "The 5 Love Languages". These concepts have helped us with our marriages, our parenting, our work relationships... to understand how others "feel" love and to "speak" their love language.
Might I ask.... during this month of Pastor Appreciation - how are you as a church expressing your love and appreciation to your pastor and his family? Let's just look at the 5 love languages to get our ideas going:
* Words of Affirmation
- Host a banquet or dinner at the church and have an open mic testimony time for people to express to the pastor just how much they have meant to them... Be sure and ask specific people to prepare something (just in case no one is brave enough to get up and talk....that could bomb the whole party!)
- Submit an open letter to your local newspaper appreciating the love and sacrifice that your pastor lives out for your church
- Film a video scrapbook - interviewing as many people as possible in the church about how the pastor has made a difference in their lives and in the church. Your young people should have the technology know-how to help with this project!
* Receiving Gifts
- Present your pastor with a Gifts of Service coupon book. Have different people in the congregation offer to do special tasks for them through out the year.
- Give them gift cards to their favorite restaurant.
- Send them on a 2-3 day get a way at a nice resort.
* Acts of Service
- Look at what is in YOUR hand. What do you have expertise in that you could offer to bless them with?
- Many times pastors do not have the expertise, funds, or time to take care of their personal things like their home or cars...
- If you are a mechanic- offer some type of free service to your pastor's car.
- If you are a handy-man - offer to fix some things at their house that need attention.
- If you are a good cook - offer to bring them a meal once a month.
- If you are a beautician - offer free haircuts for the family for the year.
- What can you do? Ask God to show you a way you can serve...
* Personal Contact (Physical Touch)
- When is the last time you personally shook the Pastor's hand and TOLD HIM how much you have been challenged from a sermon?
- Greet your pastor with a smile and an encouraging word - not just a handshake and a hello. Pause to express something more than the generic.
*Quality Time
- Take your pastor and his family out to dinner
- Ask you pastor over for dinner
- Ask your pastor and wife to join you and your spouse for a double date or a movie
Please feel free to share this post with others in your church. Even if you have already "celebrated" pastor appreciation... maybe you could do more? :)
We love our Pastors, their families, and the churches that are being lighthouses in our communities all across our nation.
Love your missionaries,
Brad & Glenda McMath
Macy, Mia, & Micah
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